Different ways of communicating?

           The question of the week is: Do I find myself communicating differently with different people and groups? I most certainly do. The first three categories of people that I thought of are family, peers, and clients. After putting some thought to the question I realize that I even communicate differently with the same people based on the circumstance. The first example that comes to mind is my grandchildren. I adore the ground they walk on and I believe that my manner, voice, body language, actions, and the fact that I tell them how much they mean to me ensures that they are aware. There are times when I am able to be with them in person, which is awesome! There are many times that I cannot see them in person so we Skype, text, send photos, face book, and talk on the phone. With each one of these methods there are inherent problems and advantages. To be even more specific as far as strategies I know that I choose subjects carefully with particular members of my family. Such as with my dad. I stick with comfortable natural topics that are not going to get him started down an ugly conversation. I love to listen intently to make sure I hear and understand that my grand’s want to tell me about their lives.

            With peers the subject and setting are pretty much set for us. Occasionally we have a personal conversation but for the most part the topics surround the weekly topic for class or a particular client. The communication (I hope) is always respectful and generally is focused on fact-finding, problem solving or validation of our understanding of a concept or situation.

            When communicating with clients these too can look very different. I have many different strategies or approaches that I use with children, which rely on the feedback that I receive from the child. Depending on the situation and how the child responds to me, determines whether I speak, sit and listen, put on music, introduce my dog or offer a means of drawing for example. In the excerpt from her book (Gonzalez-Mena, 2010) lists some things that teachers can do and one of them is “Recognize your own patterns of nonverbal behavior. Most of us are unconscious of these until we meet someone who doesn’t fir our patterns. Consider that even though your own way may feel right, normal. Or good doesn’t mean that they are in any way superior to another person’s nonverbal behavior patterns.” For me this equates into the reminder that it isn’t just about me miss-reading someone else’s non-verbal cues but that I need to be aware that I may be giving out non-verbal cues that are being miss-read.

Jenn Pore`

Gonzalez-Mena, J. (2010). 50 strategies for communicating and working with diverse

     Families. Upper Saddle River, NJ: Pearson Education, Inc.